Top Ten Things I’ve Put in My Mouth (besides my own body parts)
10. The cat’s rump (why wait for the cat poop to fall out and get covered with sand?)
9. Bees (not for long, though)
8. Feathers (from the cat’s toy. BTW difficult to spit out gracefully.)
7. $10 bill. Nina took it away, but told me to go find more.
6. Tequila. (Pronounced “to kill ya”) I walked funny afterwards.
5. (Tie) Raspberries and limes. The people seemed to be enjoying them, but I just don’t get it.
4. An entire rib-eye steak. All at once. They wouldn’t give it to me, so I had to steal it from the table while their backs were turned. Not a small feat, when you have 4 inch legs.
3. Harry Potter. Not the person, the book. I ate chapter one. Voldemort gave me indigestion.
2. Grass. Smells better than it tastes. Looks the same coming out as going in. No matter which end it comes out.
1. (Drum roll, please) Chewing Gum. Smelled so good I rolled in it too. As an added bonus, I got the best haircut EVER when we got home.