I Wonder as you Wander


Dear Flash,

I have previously remarked that your legs are only 4 inches long.  Sadly for you, it snowed 6 inches this past week.  I say this only because you are still required to go outside in order to do your *ahem* “business”.

Now, as you know, I am certainly no statistician, and am not prone to conducting scientific polls.  Informally, however, I could not find one single male acquaintance willing to strip down and run around in snow slightly higher than their…um…waist.  One or two cringed visibly when asked if they would consider…uh…relieving themselves in said snow.  When I threw in a scenario (a la A Christmas Story) involving snow, the possibility of “lifting one’s leg” on a metal fence post, and the resulting…shall we say “adherence”…of a certain appendage to said post, well, some actually passed out.

Spring is just around the corner, I’m sure.

Love, Nina



17 thoughts on “I Wonder as you Wander

  1. Dear Flash,

    Is that where the expression ‘Numb Nuts’ comes from?
    Wait… or is that ‘No Nuts’… sometimes I get confused.

    …and I suppose that is also how poopciles are made eh?

    Just sayin.

    Ambassador Schonheit

    • I’ve been using his size and the snow against him since his first Thanksgiving, when his “play” with his cousin-dog Josie took an interesting turn & he got put out in the sub-zero temperatures to cool off a little. In front of all the kids, even (“Aunt Nina, Flash plays funny!”). When we got home from Grandma’s house in Montana, Flash had a little procedure, and can no longer attempt to procreate.

  2. Dear Flash, I take back every giggle and snerk that I have ever taken at your expense. You are truly a good boy. Going out into the snow deeper than your undercarriage is heroic obedience.
    Rebecca & LMPP

      • We have both the Welsh Pembroke and a Scottish Border Collie. Both were bred as herding dogs in these European Northern Mid-Latitudes. Bordered by the North Altantic Ocean and The Great Northern sea. Last week as it was lightly drizzling and 65 degrees, I had to force them out the door and then again to the grass, while standing over them with a very large umbrella. This is Southern California, about 30 minutes north of San Diego (avg temp 74 degrees, year round) From my perspective, Numb Nuts is looking pretty darn compliant.

        • Flash used to love the cold, but I think he is getting weary of it. Yesterday my husband & I were both gone from about 6 am until almost 4:30. When we came home Flash waited almost an hour before he went outside.

  3. You look really good in the snow Flash but I am sorry that you are getting colded. I see you have a number of trails there – my advice is to try to find ‘the spot’ ASAP and get out of there.

  4. Dear Flash,

    I hope you are well… it look like both our humans have been a little slack with our blogs lately.

    Hope to hear of your lastest escapades soon!

    Ambassador Schonheit

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